It was a guy in Zakynthos that told me dogs do not really live that long.
Those poor things lived in a barrels. Chained in barrels to be painfully precise. It was sad.
Thinking back to those days i find it hard to fathom that not even a decade has past, perhaps because we tend to overlook something as un-materialistic as the passage of time in favour of more tangible experiences.
That, after all, is something that happened... the salty breeze, the bruised knee, the bloodied nose, the worrying crash from dad’s bedroom that sounded like emptying a sack of potatoes on a wooden floor. All very real (and oddly specific)
When i first got Bruma (my cat) i still had my bed screwed to the ceiling of my room and when i got Wolf each weekend was spent strolling carelessly through bookshop after bookshop.
He was always up for a long walk, and so was i.
Looking back i scold myself for being so oblivious. It was clear that i was running on borrowed time and my refusal to form a clear definition of success also meant that i would be incapable of coming to terms with my failure.
There is only so much that you can hide under the carpet before you realize that walking a dog is not something a 22 year old (or anyone for that matter) can put on their CV. But i avoided looking myself in the mirror.
Perhaps because coming to terms with the fact that i was boarding a sinking ship would have made me go cold all over. And that’s not pleasant.
Although i am in danger of angering the occasional philosophy grad, i would find joy in likening our passage through time with those “choose your own adventure” books that R.L Stine used to write. No matter the choice, there was always a disadvantage to your actions and often the only pleasure you took was the affirmation that you have not rested your fate on the chaos that surrounds your fragile self.
You never played the part of a seasoned adult that has come to terms with his insecurities, drinking calmly whatever poison life put’s his way. It was always emotional adolescents that lived under their parents protection. Right until their actions, impaired by their emotional nature and their lack of experience, set them down a haunting story which they wanted no part in.
In part, that is what AureumVitae is all about...an attempt to tear through conformity and to inspire more people in to abandoning the comfort of familiarity, in favour of introducing a little bit of that elusive unknown in to their lives.
Because if i fail, i would have at least done so on my on terms.
* male protagonist: Hey is there anything special you would like to do over the holidays?
female protagonist: Glad you asked...would you like to visit my parents?
male: Sure hun! Sounds good!
female: Just one little thing, my parents live in " insert random far away location that is habitable by no more than eight people during winter time"